Today was one of those days that just seemed like it would never end.
I have 2394723 things on my to-do list and just can't seem to cross off even ONE. As soon as I clean up one mess, another appears. I try to sit down to work on school work and someone starts screaming. I try to do some laundry and someone is wrapped around my leg begging for something. Everyone is sick and some are teething and others are just ... needy. I just feel like there isn't enough of me to go around.
And after several days of doing everything for everyone except for myself, I just can't do it anymore. I call Brian at 4:30 and tell him it's time to come home before I lose it. I know my breaking point now, and I'm almost there. I just need 5 minutes to myself. That's all. 5 minutes.
But that's not going to happen, so I swallow the lump in my throat and march to Brennan's room and collapse on his bed. And of course my 3 little shadows follow and pile on top of me and the wrestling match begins. I'm buried beneath bellies and kisses and giggles - stress and anxiety and all. For the moment, I forget and laugh with my boys and try to freeze time for just a few minutes to remember this. This beautiful, fleeting time when they want nothing more than to be around me.
I have to make me a priority. To stay healthy. To stay happy. To stay sane. To stay in this moment so that I can enjoy it instead of living for what comes next.