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Wednesday, October 31, 2012

A Not-So-Normal Day in the Life.

So this morning I decided to do an Instagram "Day in the Life" series.  Except that I also discovered that we were completely out of dog food and therefore needed to make a Target run.  Usually I either plan outings the day before or we go after naptime, but I didn't feel like starving my dogs all day long, so I kicked it into high gear.

8:00am - The Brothers wake up and are ready to cause some trouble.  I get green smoothies made and pop some Eggos in the toaster for breakfast.  Talk about a mix of healthy and not-so-healthy.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Twin Weight Tuesday {10.30.12}.

So ... how bout a last minute Twin Weight Tuesday post?

It's definitely been awhile since I felt like writing one.  Not because I fell off the wagon or anything, I just didn't feel like I had anything new and interesting to write about.  Until this weekend...

I ran 11.7 miles.  Well, ran and walked.  I ran for an hour, walked for 10 minutes, ran for another hour, walked for another 10 minutes, and then ran for another 27 minutes.  And you know what?  It felt pretty good.  My legs really started to cramp up at the end, so I stopped 3 minutes early.  But I have to say, I'm insanely proud of myself.

And?  My hubby was pretty damn amazing as well that day.  There I was, 20 minutes into my second hour of running and dying for a drink of water, when I saw this SUV drive by and slow down as it passed me.  After a double take, I realized it was Brian and the boys, bringing me water and cheering me on.  They met me after another 20 minutes to give me some more water and give me another pep talk, then headed home and met me as I turned into our neighborhood for my last 30 minutes.  It's amazing how great that man can be.  Love him to pieces.

So I'm in the home stretch.  Less than 2 weeks til my big race.  eek.  NERVOUS.

Friday, October 26, 2012

I'm back, bitches.

I'm back and better than ever.  Okay, maybe not quite that good, but definitely feeling good.

Feeling good, and looking good too if I do say so myself.

Had to go to the Ob-Gyn today, so not only did I put on clean undies, but I put on something other than yoga pants, threw some makeup on my face and some curls in my hair.  Brennan, of course, asked where we were going.  Because let's be honest, the only time Mommy puts on real clothes is when we leave the house to go somewhere special.  Oh, my poor children.

Hubby and I are planning a very productive, very fun weekend.  I'm looking forward to being able to enjoy some time with all of the most important boys in my life.  It's supposed to be pretty rainy again tomorrow since Hurricane Sandy has graced us with her presence, but that will cool things down a bit so we're going to get our Punkin' Patch on on Sunday.  Happy Fall y'all!

Favorite Posts Friday {10.26.12}.

So who's up for a little Fave Post Friday??  It's been awhile, huh?  So since it's been FOREVER since I've done an FPF, you get some of my faves from that past few months.  Congrats.  :D

Mama Laughlin - I am a Runner -- I love this.  So inspiring.  It makes me want to go for a run.  A really good run.  I need to remind myself to read it next time I'm dreading my run.

Exploits of a Military Mama - Lessons in how to raise a boy -- This is beautiful and I agree with every part of it.  An experienced Mom of 3 boys once told me that her goal was to raise her boys to be excellent husbands one day.  I think that's a great goal.  Teaching love, respect, how to be a good man - all important in raising sons.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Beautiful life..

I'm struggling.

The past few days I have been in an unbelievable funk.

I'm tired.  I'm cranky.  I'm impatient.  I'm sad.  I'm anxious.

Housework is piling up.  Leftovers are served for every meal.  Schoolwork is left unattended.  Exercise is being half-assed.  Toys are taking over.  I feel like the walls are closing in and I just.can't.breathe.

I've been feeling so good for the past few months that this is more than anything a feeling of defeat.  Like I had it conquered and it's fighting back up and grabbing hold of my leg and trying to pull me under.

On spreading acceptance, tolerance, and love.

When my parents were in town last weekend, I decided to try out a different Catholic church in the area.  We live about 2 minutes from our current church, but I’ve never felt all that connected there.  The people are nice enough, but it just doesn’t necessarily scream “you know you want to come spend an hour here every weekend” to me. 

I take Brennan to a Mom’s Morning Out program at a Catholic church that is about 15 minutes from our house.  I absolutely love their childrens’ program, so I thought I’d see what Mass was like there.  At first, I was pretty impressed.  The people seemed friendly, there were a TON of young families there, and the church itself was beautiful and modern.  They even have TV screens to follow along with the new responses/Creed.  (side note for all you Catholics: I’m never going to be able to memorize that new Creed.  “And with your Spirit”, OK.  But freaking “consubstantial with Father” kills me every.single.time.)

Monday, October 22, 2012

September 2012.

Sooooo I should probably write a September recap post before it's time to write one for October, huh?

Clearly, life has been BUSY. 

We had Beckett & Kiernan's birthday party on September 1st.  I had so much fun planning it and the day turned out beautifully.  A few days later, I headed to Michigan for class while Brian stayed home and had a blast with the boys. My heart was broken when I found out that my first day ofclass was on the twins' first birthday.  That morning was pretty rough for me, but the day shaped up pretty well.  I was able to Skype with them and then celebrated "Happy-one-year-of-not-being-pregnant-to-ME!" with my fam and my BFF.  Carrot cake, wine, and great company.  Delightful. 

We took Beckett and Kiernan for their first haircuts on September 9.  They both did AMAZINGLY well.  We were worried about Kiernan sitting still and warned the stylist about it.  But of course he made a liar out of me by behaving like a perfect angel.  All 3 boys looked so handsome with their new do's.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

And then I blinked and my babies tripled in size.

In July I sat down to write a post about the "lovey wars" that take place in our house during our sleep routine.  Three times a day, I would sit in the rocking chair in the nursery with Beckett and Kiernan on my lap and feed them their bottles before putting them to bed.  The peace and stillness of the room at that time was only ever disturbed by the battle of the lovies, arms flying around while little hands grabbed at pieces of fleece and satin.

But just 3 months later, times have changed.  There isn't much snuggling that goes on before nap time anymore. In fact, it's really just a bit less chaotic than the rest of the day.  The 3 of us walk to their room, hand-in-hand.  I sit in the rocking chair and pull Beckett onto my lap as Kiernan goes to pick out a book for us to read.  I read as much of each page as they'll allow, before someone turns the page.  We point to things on the page, name colors and animals, and when we finish a book, Kiernan slides off of my lap to choose another one.  Three times a day, we settle down for sleep by using this routine.  It's certainly not as calm and peaceful as our pre-sleep routine used to be, but it still feels good to have a lap full of my sweet boys.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Running in the rain.

I had another one of "those days" today.  And I have to admit that I didn't fare so well.  When Brian walked in the door at 6:30, I wanted to run for the nearest coffee shop with my laptop and a big huge nonfat pumpkin spice latte.

But I had an hour and a half run that needed to be attended to and Brian looked at me and said "Baby, you have to do this" so I just went.

I wasn't very happy about it.  It was raining, getting dark, and I was just plain not in the mood to run.  But halfway into that first mile, a switch flipped in my brain.  The rain felt good on my skin and smelled amazing.  I love the rain.  It's calming.  Relaxing.  Serene.

Where the wild things are.

One of the things I love about where we live is how close we are to a big, giant park.  It has beautiful trails, a few ponds, a disc golf course, and a playground, among other things.  On Sunday we decided to get the boys out of the house and into the fresh air to try to air out some of their nasty head/chest cold germs.

See this?  Only picture you'll see of Brennan less than 5 feet away from the camera.  He has NO time for pictures when he's at the park.  It's all business.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

4:07 a.m.

"Mommy.  Psssst Mommy."

I started to open my eyes and found myself nose-to-nose with a sweet little face.

"Mommy, wake up.  You need to help me go pee-pee!"

"Okay kiddo" I said as I fumbled for my glasses, grumbling a bit and lamenting the fact that I decided to put away the potty chair and make him get used to going on his seat on the big potty ... which of course he needs help with 75% of the time.

As I climbed out of bed I glanced at the clock -- 4:07 a.m.

I smiled.

How ironic.

Monday, October 15, 2012

The terrible, horrible, no good, completely suck-ass day.

That's the title of that kid's book, right?  Yeah, that's what I thought.

If you follow me on Instagram (@imflyingsouth), you had the pleasure of seeing this gem the other day:

Honest to God, it was one of the craziest days I've had in awhile.  The kind of day that 9 months ago, before therapy and Paxil, would have left me crying in the corner with a beer in my hand, on the phone with Brian begging him to come home.  Can we just pause for a moment and celebrate the fact that now when I have one of those days you can find me in the middle of it all, laughing (and wishing I had a beer in my hand, but I'm off the booze til after my race ... sue me, I like my beer), on the phone with Brian telling him that it's no problem that his boss wants him to stay late?  Yeah, I've come a long way.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Running in the dark: A paranoid girl's PSA.

OK, this is just a little PSA for all of the women runners out there.

I've been doing a lot more running outside lately and I've noticed something that kinda bothers me.  Alright, not kinda.  It totally makes me cringe and want to stop these girls and shake them ... but that would probably be frowned upon.

It's amazing to me the amount of women who run in the dusk/dark ... by themselves ... with headphones in their ears.  I mean, are you asking to get assaulted/abducted/raped/murdered????

Look, I get it.  We live in Florida where it's hot as balls during the day.  I run in the morning and evening to avoid these temps too.  But I try to make sure that the sun will either rise while I'm running, or set while I'm running, so that my whole run isn't in the dark.  And if it's going to be dark at any point during my run, I take one of the dogs with me ... usually Cooper, because he might look friendly, but I've seen him take down some fairly large animals before and he is NO JOKE when he's upset with something.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Just run.

I have less than a month before my race.  ::cold sweat::

I'm behind on my training.  Not because I can't physically do it, but because some days I have just a big giant mental block when it comes to getting out there and getting it done.  I doubt my ability to run well outside.  I doubt my ability to keep going.  I doubt my ability to run faster.  I doubt my ability to ever become a "runner".

But yesterday I had a moment of clarity.  I was 1.5 miles into a 4 mile run.  Feeling intimidated, frustrated, and uncomfortable.  I stopped to let a little girl pet Cooper and walked for a bit.  Then kept walking.  I knew I should have been running, and I wasn't sure why I wasn't.  I just couldn't bring myself to start up again.  I felt heavy.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

I have a new blog follower (HI SAMANTHA!) so I guess I should actually blog.

Creepy?  Eh, whatev.

So..... I have been a just plain shitty blogger lately.  

I have 12 half finished drafts sitting in my computer, twiddling their thumbs, waiting to be finished.  Or at least they would be if drafts had thumbs.  In my head I picture them as pieces of paper with Sponge Bob-esque arms.  No, I'm not drinking.  Or smoking.  Or sniffing anything.  I just don't talk to adults for most of the day so my mind tends to wander.  But considering my kids are one million times cuter than any adult I've ever met, I'll deal with the wandering mind.  It makes life interesting.

Almost intolerable cuteness - Exhibit A - Mr. Beckett

No but really, what DID I do with my time before I had kids?

It was 8:00 p.m. on a Tuesday night.  Brennan was in Michigan with my parents and Beckett & Kiernan had been tucked into bed for an hour.  The dishes were done, the house was picked up, and Brian had just returned from a run with the dogs. 

As he sat there and stretched, he turned to me and asked “What do people without kids do?” 
I stopped.  After thinking for a moment I replied, “ Honestly, I don’t remember.” 

I remember thinking I was busy before I had kids.  I remember feeling stress over not having enough hours in the day to accomplish everything that needed to be done.  My nursing job allowed me to work (full time) 3 nights per week.  My house was messy.  I wasn’t in school.  And yet I still felt terribly busy.  I knew life would get busier once we had kids, but it wasn’t easy to wrap my brain around just how busy it would be. 

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Basket case, er, head.

Mr. Beckett loves to put things on his head.  Boxes, blankets, bowls, baskets, even the occasional hat.  

His current headgear of choice is a little blue wire basket I bought at the dollar store for the twins' birthday party.  He loooooves this thing.  A battle of epic proportions takes place if one of his brothers dares to take it off of his head.  We also have a yellow one, but apparently it isn't the same, because the blue one is definitely the favorite.  

It's little things like this that I love and want to remember for forever.  A little quirk that makes him an individual in my litter of boys. Just another reason to love him even more than I ever thought possible.

Brennan's big adventure.

::peeks sheepishly to the left and right::

Hello?  Anybody still here?

To say life has been busy lately would be an understatement.  It's swirling around me and I'm trying desperately to keep my head above water.  Not in a bad way, just in a "Dear God, this parachute is a knapsack!" kind of way.

But this past weekend was a great break from the chaos.  My parents came into town for a visit.  We spent time in the pool at their hotel, at the beach, relaxing at our house, playing at the park, and going out to eat ... a lot.   More than anything we just spent lots of time enjoying each other's company.  I love to watch my boys interacting with their grandparents.  It's such a special relationship to watch form and grow.

Kiernan, Grammy, Brennan, Grampy, & Beckett